Rage’s head

Seething anger armed with unfair
Words; falling upon me like fists
Aimed at that which I dare not see
I am done with this
Red and burning heat
Firing upon my face and hands
Until truth can no longer be seen
I’ve not felt this rage for so long
Thought maybe it was gone
But here you stand, raised voices again
And nothing left of me

morning meditation

I leave behind the chaos
Of my mind
To sink deep to where my
Emotions hide
Dark and warm
Flashing colors speak and play
Silence thickens into lines
As I let go of word and thought
Transformed into sound
That cannot be heard, but felt
Alive! I vibrate as a deep resounding
Wave; light and grey…
Above me, I hear the call of a bell
And returning from this place
Of peace, I bring with me the sounds
I’ve felt… to walk! To dream! To dance
Upon the gates of heaven’s spell
I am reborn into this day

on Traveling

There is a portal between worlds
That you can only enter through your heart
It’s thick and slow
Sounds are deliberate and hold meaning
The horns of a great beast opened
The door for me; and there he stands
Collecting me back
Oh! As I breathe in this heat; as energy
Transforms into magic at each breath-
I linger, seeing the gray in the distance of
The world in which I travel
But for my few moments my heart is stopped
And I become one with the nothing
Of silence and reunion

Unrest

unrest, wanderlust, disease
thoughts of fleeing, urges deep
my yearning to run from myself
sits heavily in the folds of my eyes
vision blurred, blurring yet more
each moment a longing filled with grief
what change can capture my mind
what can still this need
crying out inside
this pitiless desire grips me
so i can no longer breathe
yet, still, i sit and wait for what’s mine
to return and fill the void, quiet the need

The moment

I can no longer hold the waters
Of what was; as they flow down
My eyes, my breast, my legs
Memories sparkling in the droplets
Now settling at the place where
My feet once lay
The sun will dissolve my pain-
The earth, drinks now from the puddles
Of my past
Oh drunken day! You offer me nothing but
The moment now, this present in which
This poor heart remains

No more

Steady now, my feet touch the floor
Softly resting, my mind, calmer now
Ceases turning, and slows into the silence…
How long since I’ve been with you!
My beloved heart- still beating,
As old friends wait for me, inside this old
Door… alas! I have flown from the fire
And I am no more!
Do not look for me, or mourn my passing
I am stardust floating
And sun rays bursting
And songbirds singing
And cannot be touched anymore…

A darker foil

It’s been so long since I’ve been without
this knot in my throat and this dread in my mind…
Black, menacing, waiting,
Just sitting there reminding me that Anger is close by:
Feeling me, urging me closer to it,
so that I cannot speak or hear or cry….
This bloody clot that won’t move,
binding my voice with something
stronger than magic…

Suffocating! My heart yearns for the open air and the sun-
Within darkness my being has sunken,
and within Anger’s cage I dwell now-
Lost amidst fear, and confused joy;
Wandering in the darkness- blind and feverish,
My words act out without wisdom or thought,
but in defense of a darker foil….
I am the mistaken soul who sunk willingly
into Anger’s dreadful water-
And drowning now my heart cries for
breathe and air.