peace what’s peace
but a false lie about what
we should have if we tried harder-
there’s no quiet…
the walls of the room are closing
around… chest tight throat closing
the sound of guitar masking the pain
feeling like a child on a rainy day
sun shining breeze through my hair
smile on my face
but what’s to be done when darkness
comes knocking at the door?
i run to answer it knowing that it’s an old friend
greetings and hugs- we get down to business
i’m simply sitting at odds….
two sides of me at once
peaceful happy smiling face and darkened brooding inside me
Tag: sorrow
this heart
as the day slowly wanes
and sunlight softens behind
the clouds that cooled the heat
with welcome rain I think of
what my heart would say
if she could speak in a manner
i could fully understand
about our past together…
would she feel warm like I do now
under cover of billowing clouds
or would she hate, like I’ve learned
from pain…
i think my heart might like to sing
because my soul tells me that she’s
an actress
cold void
oh how I wish for some distraction
from the loneliness of my heart…
but all the pretty flowers have been plucked
and the baby birds fell from the nest
into the mulch
and all that was glorious about the sun
leaves my skin burned and aching…
so within the cold void I linger now
waiting for my secrets to bubble up
because nothing stays hidden forever
when the quiet has silenced all else
back to you
obsessive and unnatural-
the curves of thought
spiraling into dirty depths
of diseased memory, that link
back to you
dark and twisted passion, engraved
by a tortured tool, remain etched
within the walls of souls-
writing that predates first breath
and solvency
and these violent acts of love,
tied forever back to your touch,
remain within twisted fingers
bound by string- always
leading back to you
sleep
Lying in bed listening
to the slow drip of my love
that from my broken heart
falls rhythmically into the sink
this maddening drip drip drip
echoes in my head refusing rest
or peace…
I wait for the day that this heart may
finally empty of its love so that
I may get some sleep
waking tear
oh! would that i could protect my heart
from such weakness it has for you…
when your soul sings sweet nothings
to me, drifting me softly to sleep;
for within those lullabies, lies hope
that you might yet, find me…
though soul’s purpose be shrouded-
clouded by misgivings of the day,
i can’t help but think of thoughts
that you might still find your way…
and within those thoughts, held is grief,
for my eyes hear what my ears refuse
to see… you, my love, are but a memory
and I am just a waking tear
druken with sorrow
i dreamt of a blue and purple buddha-
with a slight smile upon his face,
and i wondered as i lay awake
what he might know, that i do not,
about my destiny…
the stars seem so misaligned,
i’m missing signs, like leaves
upon a stream, I drift aimlessly
towards some unknown sea…
and i hold no hope that the world
might reveal the path
my feet are meant to follow
as i slowly make my way home
drunken now with sorrow.
silent heart
This abusive mind
Has locked the door
on my pleading heart
Such that her beating
Lies silent in my chest
the SIBYL'S SONG 