Tag: healing

regret

it’s a sad resolution
this end of year mess
this nightmare that has no waking relief
this wound that has no dress
i am but a sailor adrift at sea
i am but a boat with no anchor
floating invisibly
what will happen to this heart of mine
when the cold winter blows though
the tattered halls of what once stood strong
there is nothing left for me
there is nothing left to see
sorrow and regret dogging days
with cold remorse
and hate
and tears that fall as cold as frozen rain
oh life! you can be cruel, i know
and i am nothing more than a joke
drifting off the shore

Ghost

don’t fall in love with a ghost;
she’ll haunt your halls,
moaning down your corridors,
calling your name on the wind-
and when you try to grasp her
and hold her in your arms
she’ll fall like dust at your feet-
and all you’ve ever desired
will float upon the miserable
breeze; an unfulfilled longing,
never to be quenched, an echo,
never quite caught up to-
until one day you look around
and understand you’ve been chasing
your entire life an illusion,
hoping to hold it and kiss and love it-
don’t let yourself fall for a ghost
she’ll only bring you nothing-
and nothing cannot sustain your heart

chaos

the chaos that lies within me
burns for more of my heart-
it’s a fire fueled by emotion
and lines like flowers upon the
fields of my past.
i yearn for more, not knowing
that these poppies are poison
and my heart, though innocent yet,
doesn’t know how to remain
in the stillness of my moments
without some tumult
to turn the focus upon its head…
for too long this soul has nurtured
chaos as a friend, afraid to live
within the silence that would
bring upon me all that’s been done-
too fearful to look, to face the past,
i linger within my self made prison instead
hoping that one day change
might find this heart and still
the fires within my breast

hope

so thankful
blessed
forgiven
loved
reunited
faithful
all these things
dropping in
fullness from
my heart
as my face
peers into
the vast
abyss with
hope

Illusions

i am but a ghost walking the halls
of my former life
without justice, without light;
all that was, is lost now
to the veil of illusion
that’s fallen from my eyes…
my whispers echo unheard
against the bare walls that
once held accomplishment
and pride…
nothing remains now but memory
of a me that was never real,
but lost inside a maze of falsehood
and pretend;
one can never measure up to what’s
never been there
and my heart, fearful and full of rage,
would take this image of myself
that it held to be true
and burn it into flame
and let the dust settle upon these empty
walls with hate filled shame

just a joke

just a joke
my face, my heart, my untethered
fleeting fate;
the folds of time that keep
this flame burning;
this life in its entirety…
just a joke
flying, falling, burning, rising
all just the same boring
proposition that leads
me back to the same place
within the heavens-
so why are these tears still
falling?
there’s nothing left to fear
as all that was, is ripped from
me…
i am no more
but a joke to behold
i thrive on the falsehood of
my illusions
and tie my heart to a failing
sun and waning moon

smote upon the ground

i am sometimes unwell…
i sometimes suffer at the hands
of mental abandonment,
and when this force of logic
is untethered from my reality
i am destined to crash
after i fly;
broken bones, shattered emotions,
chaos around me
burning all i’ve built to the ground
as i fall into a deeper darkness…
cycles of my mind swirl
like falling leaves within a tunnel
of whipping wind;
impossible to follow;
ripping at the frayed edges of soul-
until all that was, ends up smote
upon the ground