There lies just beneath my smile
A deep and venerable pain
That I can’t explain, or wish away-
I try to escape, into ideas and words
that might distract my brain,
But it’s always there, waiting for me
Like an ache that won’t release,
A knot in my chest with no relief,
So I sit here and pretend that
It’s all okay
It’s just a deep and venerable pain.
Tag: truth
magician
I loved a man desperately
and that desperation made
me believe that truth was illusion,
and illusion truth.
A slight of hand, and my complicit
willingness to disbelieve
what lay right in front of me,
burned my soul to ash.
Beware of magicians who come
dressed as ordinary men.
holes
You ask for my decision
Will I give you what you need?
I hesitate blindly
Knowing that I am too broken
To fill your heart with light
How can I catch rainbows
When my net is full of holes?
time
The beating of your heart
Is a clock I can keep time by
Steady and confident
I lay my head down
To listen to the rhythmic
Tock of your constancy
And lose my thoughts
To the wash of time
strange and ponderous
Sitting in my car, sunroof open,
staring at the clouds
as I listen to cars hustle by-
And I think of fresh linen
What a juxtaposition
Clean skies, and dirty sounds
Thinking of my life, such
wondrous similarities….
healthy living masking
dirty emotions
that lie just underneath
a clean facade
….Strange and ponderous
today
today
i turned a page
i walked away
i let you go
i forgot your face
i blocked your fire
i closed the gate
though my longing stays
and your illusions remain
and the magic i thought i held
well, it’s still what i crave
so i can claim the day,
i suppose…
i can profess that i am free
to find another way
but i let you in, and parts of you
…they still remain
i will need sometime i guess
to clean my house
and hope the scent of you
slowly fades away
abundant
I am the earth
my robes flow into endless fields of gold
and my heart carries songs of birds on the wind
the fire within me burns
with glory and contemplation
my unending source of power and love
I am abundant and give freely
of my healing streams; my valleys
dotted with the scent of flowers and truth
I am constant and unending
I have enough for all who love me
and more for those who cannot
***************************************************
nothing
when there is nothing left
nothing is there
and nothing can change that
or make it into something it is not
so I say goodbye to release myself
from the strange hold your
nothing had over me
the SIBYL'S SONG 