Tag: soullessons

Journey to my foremothers

I was cold and I went down a dirty staircase
Coming up the other side I felt deary
Butterfly flew past me and birds
I wanted to find my grandmother
I wanted to understand how to heal
the relationship with my mom
Her mother was there
They showed me the unhappiness that lingered in the family
Grandmother senior had a cold and distant husband
And grandmother had an alcoholic
And mom had a cheater
And the anger that she felt
Shaped me, suffocated me
I was frightened and full of fear-
Collapsed under her dark cloud of anger

I understood that the pain she lived with lives with me too
The fear she felt from the cruelty of her parent’s toxicity
resides with me
And that I can heal my family line
By healing myself of this pain
My fore mothers are with me still
Shining a light even in darkness
Showing me another way

And it felt like popping and glowing
This release of energy, deep and profound
Healing- deep and releasing
I let go of old stored feelings trapped
Beneath… popping and dancing off my skin
And peace blossomed in the painful areas
As understanding shined through the darkness

Sway

The wind calls to me
Singing ancient tunes from far away
My heart hears the words,
Whispers of lifetimes past,
And she is exalted beyond the veil
To see, to feel, to be!
And the earth, she holds me in her womb
As the music plays and rustles
My heart, she sways
Rooted in and lost to the echoes
Of what was and remains still
Within the beating of this moment

A journey

I went down into the earth-
dug down and through
Emerging in a lake- rising in the air
Shaking and gyrating
Until the bear and fox caught me
Grandmother fire- making a rattle
Sitting like a tree, brown and withered
Grandmother earth- giving and smiling
Fire consumes flesh
As fear fades away
Handing me the rattle- passing passing
Smiling, sitting- brown like a tree stump
Brown like the earth I dug through
Don’t leave, though I will remain
As you go, you remain with me
Sound your rattle, uplift these ears
Enliven this heart
Stillness is the way.

Waking soul’s ode to energy

Fog, thick with sound and intention,
Wrapped full my head and eyes
Entered my breathe and became one with me-
As my heart cried out for more-
This glowing, found just through the gates
Of my heart,
And my fervent singing enlivened by
The flame of energy,
Rooted within day’s waking dream….
I am passionless and prostrate
To the sound of the eternal nothing I hear!
Wash away with me-
I will float upon your white crystals until
I am lost to the sea, I give myself
Over to the depth of what I do not see
Feelings burst through as raindrops fall
I am a walking soul bound to the mysteries
Of what is shown now to my heart

Rage’s head

Seething anger armed with unfair
Words; falling upon me like fists
Aimed at that which I dare not see
I am done with this
Red and burning heat
Firing upon my face and hands
Until truth can no longer be seen
I’ve not felt this rage for so long
Thought maybe it was gone
But here you stand, raised voices again
And nothing left of me

on Traveling

There is a portal between worlds
That you can only enter through your heart
It’s thick and slow
Sounds are deliberate and hold meaning
The horns of a great beast opened
The door for me; and there he stands
Collecting me back
Oh! As I breathe in this heat; as energy
Transforms into magic at each breath-
I linger, seeing the gray in the distance of
The world in which I travel
But for my few moments my heart is stopped
And I become one with the nothing
Of silence and reunion

The moment

I can no longer hold the waters
Of what was; as they flow down
My eyes, my breast, my legs
Memories sparkling in the droplets
Now settling at the place where
My feet once lay
The sun will dissolve my pain-
The earth, drinks now from the puddles
Of my past
Oh drunken day! You offer me nothing but
The moment now, this present in which
This poor heart remains