this cold heart feels nothing-
hidden behind walls of shame
and disdain
it lingers only to see the suffering
that mirrors it’s own
and the disgust it feels for weakness
is only matched by the disgust
it feels for itself
there’s nothing to be gained
by trying to love a thing as cool
as death itself
it’s cruelty knows no end
for it matches that which it knows…
ashamed
Tag: life lessons
rivers
tears rolled down the mountain
cutting a way through trees and
debris
as if an unstoppable pain forged
these snaking rivers…
and the stars watched in disdain
as the birds sang in the distance
what if?
what is left when you remove the
sun from the sky?
do stars provide heat to comfort the soul
or are they just cold light shining
in darkness?
would the moonlight hold such sway
if the burning sun were not
her mighty foil?
am i anything without you?
oh! to be rid of these ponderous thoughts
that plague my mind so…
notes of love
oh! these notes of love
written with invisible ink
travel through time and space
searching out the heart that might
have the eyes to read
what is etched upon my soul
just an echo
empty halls at dawn echo thoughts
back to my heart like a drum
pounding into place all that was
left behind…
sound bouncing off bare walls
these feelings that hover in the distant
places of my soul
would that i grab them in my hand
and within my palm hold them
close so as to understand how they
became just an echo
slow roam of memory
slow roam of memory
floating on an endless sea
bobbing aimless and lonesome-
lost to the moonswept tides
and windy breeze
these wanderings
not empty but void of depth;
voiceless and lacking solvency
oh! that these small specks of remembrance
might swell into a vessel that might
bring back what’s lost to me!
adrift at sea
my heart cannot find
the hope that lies hidden
within the ramblings of forgotten time
and though I search the vestiges of
my mind to materialize what’s been lost
there’s no hiding the unseen loss
of this vacancy
long halls of time
voices hang in the air
flowing over breeze, making their
way back to me;
words i would long to hear
from long ago…
echoes of a past not mine
but somehow left in my memory…
and though your arms no longer
hold me- i can still hear your
whispering through the long
halls of time
harkening me backwards
fire of my eternity
the afternoon sun warms my foot as
my heel bobs up and down,
uncomfortably,
memory finds its way forward-
past moving through time
slow like sludge…. so begrudgingly…
small bits of a puzzle fit together
to form a larger picture of me…
and yet, I hate this digging
into history; would that I remain
stuck here in present frame
to suffer in darkness than to shed
light onto such lunacy and pain…
yet- to survive into an unknown
future the puzzle must complete
and when it does- i will burn it-
releasing all that was stored into
the ether… oh to shed the skin of
what was and be reborn!
so I sit with my own hot past
shaking, biting and scratching memories
out of the darkness and into the light
so I can fit them together
and let them go into the fire of my
eternity…
day of reckoning
there is nothing left to give
of myself… utterly drained
and driven to distraction
i wish it were not today
this day of reckoning that comes
with such brutal constancy
for my heart is tired
and my mind is spinning
and my soul feels worn like
a flag left out too many winters…
this heat is draining any remnant
of sanity that i may still possess
and still… i will go to this destiny
as appointed, to relive the pain that
resides within the hidden closets
of my memory
cruel illusion
i fear that I would wander the world
looking for that which already
lingers within me, afraid that
what is housed in my heart is
not enough to sustain love…
even as the sun shines
and the moon shines
i would question this because
darkness is a cruel illusion
that enters as friend and never leaves
oh! my cruel friend turned master
what would you have me do but feed
your emptiness with more of me?
the SIBYL'S SONG 