Thoughts that from my heart
Drip slowly to the floor
Leave me standing in a puddle
Of tears and pondering
What is the leak that from my
Veins flow- this quiet of time,
That lingers now upon a dirty
Ground waiting for me?
And this smile fastened to my mouth
Would you see the false lips curve
Or kiss the frailty that collects now
At my feet?
Innocence has no reserve
For when this well runs dry,
what will remain to quench
This hurt?
this burning ball of energy
in the sky hurts my eyes today-
too bright for my heart to
hold,
too hot for my hands…
my mind sweats at the mere thought
of this heat that would light
my dust filled corners
with cleansing fire and expose me…
utterly
love hangs loosely at my door-
the scent of which I can smell
lingering in the air just outside;
and i long to run to it
disappearing within the trails of
soft perfume…
but that my heart is slow to move
for fear of what might hover
near the vulnerable parts of me…
laid bare by love’s intense passion-
my soul’s nakedness may be too much
for my poor heart to endure-
should love’s affection lead to rejection-
my very essence would be destroyed…
so I linger here on the edge of the
doorway-
hoping for a sign of fidelity
that would allow me to pass through
the sweet aroma of love’s call
and find that which is joy within me
The sorrow is dark and utter
As if you’re sinking into yourself
Your eyes fall inward and behind
And the light hides
Collapsing like a wave function
Your darkness is overtaking
And you’ve given up the back
That used to carry you through
I sense so little hope in your arms
As they settle at your sides
Your spirit hangs softly from your spine
Within the warmth of our embrace
Would that I could pull the sorrow
From your chest and swallow it
Whole, so as to be rid of this evil
And find love
Though you carry such pain
Your heart is but yours to heal
Though I try to provide comfort
Within yourself is the way to light
messages linger upon the dusty waves
of time, without structure or form-
and yet, contain such beauty of meaning
such that to pull one single silent memo
from the air would be to connect with divine…
these invisible notes left by our-selves
to be found when the time is right
and the mood is fine
oh to give my heart over to these wanderings of
wisdom…
what more could i do to open these
ears of mine to see the truth that lingers
just outside my view?
mother mary visited me riding
on the wave of a sneeze that
didn’t come…
and i was swimming in a purple
sea…
whispers of faith, echoing-
time and space but figments
in my mind
i am both lost and found
when i walk this line
would that i could cry tears of pain
from my soul
just to release the heavy water
that hangs my heart so low….
i would line the sky with thunder clouds
to let the heavens roar
and rain pour down- until this
sorrow was released
from the very depths of me…
Oh to be a cloud that could just let go-
these burdens- how they haunt me so
swollen with the remnants of wine
from last night, this heavy head
moves through the morning slow
and uncertain
what was that you said? things aren’t
what they’ve seemed and your heart
isn’t as constant as you’ve led me to
believe…
the world is turning, and now i’m flipped
onto this aching head
left to make sense of all of this
while you quietly remove your heart
from the conversation…
fear invades the corners of my soul
i guess in the end i gave up control
nothing is the same anymore
insecure and longing devotion
love lingers just on the edge of the heart
hoping that fickle feeling might remain steady;
while reason, stalwart and cold,
lines the boundaries of the mind with doubt
ahh… the sweet pangs of emotion
love’s nectar that can taste so tart
cruel is not a strong enough word
for that which my heart finds
capable; some might call me
cold- though within this chest flows
something more than ice-
it’s an emptiness that cannot be
described…
and yet i try to love, i do, with the
limited warmth i have within me,
there’s just no loving a cool cool
darkness…. it’s like breathing in space
i would take your breathe away and then
explode your lungs into tiny slivers of
frozen stone
best to leave it alone…. i can’t even
stand myself.
the SIBYL'S SONG 