Seething anger armed with unfair
Words; falling upon me like fists
Aimed at that which I dare not see
I am done with this
Red and burning heat
Firing upon my face and hands
Until truth can no longer be seen
I’ve not felt this rage for so long
Thought maybe it was gone
But here you stand, raised voices again
And nothing left of me
Tag: lettinggo
A darker foil
It’s been so long since I’ve been without
this knot in my throat and this dread in my mind…
Black, menacing, waiting,
Just sitting there reminding me that Anger is close by:
Feeling me, urging me closer to it,
so that I cannot speak or hear or cry….
This bloody clot that won’t move,
binding my voice with something
stronger than magic…
Suffocating! My heart yearns for the open air and the sun-
Within darkness my being has sunken,
and within Anger’s cage I dwell now-
Lost amidst fear, and confused joy;
Wandering in the darkness- blind and feverish,
My words act out without wisdom or thought,
but in defense of a darker foil….
I am the mistaken soul who sunk willingly
into Anger’s dreadful water-
And drowning now my heart cries for
breathe and air.
lost myself
I wanted you to stop,
I wanted to scream it,
But my words got stuck in my chest
And just spun around there
In fury and in darkness,
Like a wound I couldn’t heal,
A scab I couldn’t pick-
This itch that screamed in pain
For lack
Making me sick…
It boiled over, blasting red hot rage
All over my breast
Lack of breath-
Stunted I sat enraged by this lack,
This hole,
This nagging pain with no voice,
Until it ate away at my soul,
Until there was nothing left of my joy
But remnants of your explosion…
I wanted you to stop
To scream it from the depths of my heart-
But my voice carried no wave
And I lost myself to the pain
Where?
Rape
Days after, you smiled at me-
After you told all your friends
How you’d bagged me;
You thought we’d still be friends…
And I smoked too much weed,
And let myself smile back;
Like a doll or a thing-
It was all so surreal, if I could just
Push down and pretend-
That you weren’t just ringing in my ear
Panic in my chest
Hate in my heart
Loathing on my breast
You thing! Who took from me that which was
Mine to give
You hateful thing smiling like you didn’t just take
And what of me? Of this sinking, blocking
Building…
Where did the screams go?
june dew
Rape
Summer darkness on my face
And dew clinging to my back;
Your body, heavy, in my space,
Left the world behind me-
Like a bolt of red light
You shot through my peace,
Devastating what was left of me-
And alone, my naked body walked
In circles, stammering like a broken record,
As submissive pee ran down my leg
Wildflowers
Closets that were locked are opened
And the contents held within
Have spilled upon my soul…
Dark echoes swirl with hunger
Around my head and heart-
So long deprived of open air,
So long pushed into the corners
And forgotten-
They grow in pitch until the fire that
Lit them slowly finds the will
To let go and just smoke-
Filling my soul with cleansing incense;
The holes that were left so long ago
Are now covering over
As wildflowers begin to grow
The coming of the winter solstice
Longest day approaches
And the pregnant sky prepares
For the birth of another sun-
Holy is the coming of light!
And the moon, full in her power,
Comforts the pain of new beginnings;
What is to come now that the darkness
Is pushed aside once again?
And what lingers in the shadows yet?
All is love as we find the new awakening
Of a new year
Heart and mind as one-
Between the inhale and the exhale;
The death and birth of change;
We grow inside this interface
And sing the ancient songs of praise.
Wings of love
Standing again at the edge,
Peering into an abyss that echoes
Hundreds of lifetimes
Of songs and faith and fear…
And now that my toes curl upon the
Rough edge of a destiny that must
Include a leap of faith
I falter not
For all that’s been, remains true
And all that is yet to come,
Is mine, save my heart remain,
And my nerves still,
And these wings I’ve built upon the
Sweat of my pain
Open in a steady beat of unconditional
Love
The other side
Whirlwind of pain and anxiety
Storm through this heart of mine
Dread and fatigue banish
Happiness as anger
Replaces the dawn with more
Red darkness
Alone and left without a shoulder
To lean my weary head upon
I sigh at the very thought of moving
In any direction
Save into more pain and despair
There’s nothing left to hold onto
As illusions of fate wash away
All that remains are shattered ruins
Of hopes and dreams and plans
While I await whatever decidedly
Waits for me now on the other side
Of all things
Darkness
My heart is drowning in black
Ooze, unable to breathe
It languishes and struggles
For air, oh life! You cruel cruel
Master, devouring my light
Releasing hope to the darkness
That now envelopes my spirit
And drowns the very essence
Of me
What can a heart do when it’s taken
From soul and left alone to
Search out safe passages;
Longing only to return back to the
Fire of home..
Lost to the darkness, muffled cries
Remain unheard as this heart
Beats without resolve
And I sink into the darkness
That’s taken hold
the SIBYL'S SONG 