My heart is drowning in black
Ooze, unable to breathe
It languishes and struggles
For air, oh life! You cruel cruel
Master, devouring my light
Releasing hope to the darkness
That now envelopes my spirit
And drowns the very essence
Of me
What can a heart do when it’s taken
From soul and left alone to
Search out safe passages;
Longing only to return back to the
Fire of home..
Lost to the darkness, muffled cries
Remain unheard as this heart
Beats without resolve
And I sink into the darkness
That’s taken hold
Tag: darkness
Illusions
i am but a ghost walking the halls
of my former life
without justice, without light;
all that was, is lost now
to the veil of illusion
that’s fallen from my eyes…
my whispers echo unheard
against the bare walls that
once held accomplishment
and pride…
nothing remains now but memory
of a me that was never real,
but lost inside a maze of falsehood
and pretend;
one can never measure up to what’s
never been there
and my heart, fearful and full of rage,
would take this image of myself
that it held to be true
and burn it into flame
and let the dust settle upon these empty
walls with hate filled shame
Dusk of love
your emotions are a black hole
they are always growing
in darkness
and never filled with
anything that resembles light,
eager to devour all that you see-
when your spinning emotional
avalanche falls upon me
i shudder in its wake…
And when you choose to share
your misery with others
all see you and despair
for your selfish heart is
full of only you
and no others
and all you can see is you
and your darkness
and i am tired of living in
the dusk of love
the fool
there was nothing there for me
when i looked into that
grand expanse
it was all just noise
and though i longed for some
great sage advice
that might lead me perhaps
to that which i seek
i sit in disappointment
because the darkness i so
wished to confront
was but my own echo
back at me
the frailty of life! what can release
the dull ache that lies just beneath
this exterior of cool?
perhaps it’s all just a fake
and I am the ultimate fool
fire of my eternity
the afternoon sun warms my foot as
my heel bobs up and down,
uncomfortably,
memory finds its way forward-
past moving through time
slow like sludge…. so begrudgingly…
small bits of a puzzle fit together
to form a larger picture of me…
and yet, I hate this digging
into history; would that I remain
stuck here in present frame
to suffer in darkness than to shed
light onto such lunacy and pain…
yet- to survive into an unknown
future the puzzle must complete
and when it does- i will burn it-
releasing all that was stored into
the ether… oh to shed the skin of
what was and be reborn!
so I sit with my own hot past
shaking, biting and scratching memories
out of the darkness and into the light
so I can fit them together
and let them go into the fire of my
eternity…
cruel illusion
i fear that I would wander the world
looking for that which already
lingers within me, afraid that
what is housed in my heart is
not enough to sustain love…
even as the sun shines
and the moon shines
i would question this because
darkness is a cruel illusion
that enters as friend and never leaves
oh! my cruel friend turned master
what would you have me do but feed
your emptiness with more of me?
the SIBYL'S SONG 