morning glory vines
fed by an outcry of emotional discontent
climb, wind and stretch
to find the light that lingers within
the power of my own intuition..
and its this longing for clarity
that allows emotions to quietly strangle
that which they strive to emulate
oh! that i could allow feelings a safe
place to wind towards the light
that would not sacrifice the voice
within me that might lead me towards
a greater fate….
I have a darkness
that runs deep within me
buried like a well
to feed the pain inside;
The deepness runs through
space and time
securing my fears back
beyond this life…
And I linger here now
trying to make sense of this darkness
that covets me so
I tipped my boat
In the sea of love
So I could take a swim
It was colder than I anticipated
And the waves of longing
That had built up within
Were darkened by emotions
That I had not thought given
So I lay upon the drifting waves
Letting memories in
Hoping that in my silence
The sun would shine again
it seems to me
that every time i look for myself
i get caught staring into the mirror
of another
as if their eyes are deeper than mine
as if their lips are fuller
and their lines are finer
and I wonder why the reflection
that is my own
is not enough for me
the quiet in my mind
is only matched by the
screaming of my heart…
I long for the day when the duality
that lies within my soul
be replaced by a singular
self acceptance
You rode into town
on a beautiful white steed
and promised me the stars-
packed neatly in a bottle
of snake oil
And I bought it from you…
the cost was my heart-
which I paid to you quite generously
There’s a river of forgiveness
that resides just within
my mind’s eye;
I can see it
as it peacefully flows down
to soothe my heart
from the fire you left behind
You ask for my decision
Will I give you what you need?
I hesitate blindly
Knowing that I am too broken
To fill your heart with light
How can I catch rainbows
When my net is full of holes?
Sitting in my car, sunroof open,
staring at the clouds
as I listen to cars hustle by-
And I think of fresh linen
What a juxtaposition
Clean skies, and dirty sounds
Thinking of my life, such
wondrous similarities….
healthy living masking
dirty emotions
that lie just underneath
a clean facade
….Strange and ponderous
today
i turned a page
i walked away
i let you go
i forgot your face
i blocked your fire
i closed the gate
though my longing stays
and your illusions remain
and the magic i thought i held
well, it’s still what i crave
so i can claim the day,
i suppose…
i can profess that i am free
to find another way
but i let you in, and parts of you
…they still remain
i will need sometime i guess
to clean my house
and hope the scent of you
slowly fades away
the SIBYL'S SONG 