Tag: anger

A darker foil

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It’s been so long since I’ve been without
this knot in my throat and this dread in my mind…
Black, menacing, waiting,
Just sitting there reminding me that Anger is close by:
Feeling me, urging me closer to it,
so that I cannot speak or hear or cry….
This bloody clot that won’t move,
binding my voice with something
stronger than magic…

Suffocating! My heart yearns for the open air and the sun-
Within darkness my being has sunken,
and within Anger’s cage I dwell now-
Lost amidst fear, and confused joy;
Wandering in the darkness- blind and feverish,
My words act out without wisdom or thought,
but in defense of a darker foil….
I am the mistaken soul who sunk willingly
into Anger’s dreadful water-
And drowning now my heart cries for
breathe and air.

Illusions

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i am but a ghost walking the halls
of my former life
without justice, without light;
all that was, is lost now
to the veil of illusion
that’s fallen from my eyes…
my whispers echo unheard
against the bare walls that
once held accomplishment
and pride…
nothing remains now but memory
of a me that was never real,
but lost inside a maze of falsehood
and pretend;
one can never measure up to what’s
never been there
and my heart, fearful and full of rage,
would take this image of myself
that it held to be true
and burn it into flame
and let the dust settle upon these empty
walls with hate filled shame

oh, this anger…

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i would bring this roof of folly down
upon my head, before i bent my knee
again…
you are a joke hiding inside a person
hoping that you won’t be discovered
as the fool you are
there is nothing i would like more
than to laugh at your pain
as you sit, confused, trying to
understand why you failed… yet again…
you stupid, stupid excuse
for someone who cares… i would
rather watch you burn
inside your own lies and buffoonery
than piss on your burning body
to put you out….

revenge

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i wear hate like a weapon, tied
at my waist
consuming each step with depth
and purpose
would that I could burn this absurdity
to the ground, and dance upon
the ashes of what remains
with laughter on my voice
and darkness in my heart
oh anger, my deepest ally
my darkest asset
this stirring creates such pain
within my soul
and yet, i cling to you now as breath
to a newborn child
as revenge weighs heavily upon
my chest

just a joke

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just a joke
my face, my heart, my untethered
fleeting fate;
the folds of time that keep
this flame burning;
this life in its entirety…
just a joke
flying, falling, burning, rising
all just the same boring
proposition that leads
me back to the same place
within the heavens-
so why are these tears still
falling?
there’s nothing left to fear
as all that was, is ripped from
me…
i am no more
but a joke to behold
i thrive on the falsehood of
my illusions
and tie my heart to a failing
sun and waning moon

venerable hell

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within the gates of pain that lock
my soul to the post of past transgressions
i pay this penance for that which was
altered when the sun shone, and the moon
was ripe with strawberries and songbirds…
would that i release this soul to find the freedom
that dogs it so, yet apology’s song sounds
weak when presented upon winter’s
cold blow, now nothing but pain remains
within the heart that lingers still upon
days past, haunted by that which was
already accepted as fate
and drawn down into the cold entrance
of a venerable, indefatigable hell

without remorse

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enflamed, destructive anger
burned the house of love
to the ground,
without remorse,
leaving the charred corpse of
compassion upon the floor…
this ever burning flame of
rage, that would take the
softest of feelings
and turn them into painful
blistering sores,
engulfs this soul with such
disgust that not even ash
remains

frustration

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Frustration
has reached a boiling point
Bubbling over anger can no longer
Be contained
And all that was good inside this
Heart’s pot
Is lost to the sides
Steam is all that’s left
Of what was once love
And through these elemental
Alterations
Only remnants of scent
Remain

on work today…

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this slow death robs the heart
of passion and flame
just a slow drip of gray nothing
that lines a normal day
and this fire that burns, the heat
cannot stay when the drawl of nothing
sucks oxygen from air
and joy from an imaginative heart
oh this ever so tedious march-
death couldn’t come soon enough!
blue striped suits, and fake smiling
and deficit eyes that stare…
i am dying and don’t know how
i even got here…

eclipse the day

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daylight is brewing
and the sound of busy
birds fill my head with pretty
tunes
they have been singing
for hours now
as i’ve laid in bed-
alone with this anger,
my heart
and my head-
it’s raging through, lashing
and scratching
so appalling, alas though,
what else what can i do?
i’ve sat with this pain for so long now
i’m drowning in the darkness
of this horrid state…
trapped, i wait for the sunlight
to remind me that i’m awake
and okay…
how does one keep going-
when anger-so strongly- can eclipse
the day?