lost to time

~lost to time~

Betrayal rips at my heart, it dangles to the floor
Once I had your heart for my own

…no more…

I have been searching the skies ever since
Looking for a glimpse of your face

Sometimes I see the stars shine down on me
And I remember your soft smile
The way you made me feel

Love that is no longer is no love for me
But heartache hung like a weight upon my breast

And a hunger that I will never satisfy

I call out your name in dreams
Longing to hold you but once again

To smell your skin, your hair, your mouth

I awake with desolation in my heart

I am lost without you.

You are not there.

Piotr and the blind woman

~Piotr and the blind woman~

There was once a god named Piotr and he fell in love with a woman who was stricken with blindness.

She couldn’t see him, she couldn’t understand what he was- but Piotr loved her still for her trusting nature; soft like a flower.

Each day Piotr would come down and whisper to her- tell her how beautiful she was… tell her how lovely and gentle her soul was. He would embrace her in her spirit form- dance with her fire, her light like a leaf on a breeze.

One day Piotr came down and she was missing. Not in her usual place. Not anywhere.

He gnashed his teeth. He thundered the sky… he cried tears of rain for days.

Where had his flower gone?

He returned daily to the spot his beloved would sit… waiting to see if she would return. Everyday he swept down, everyday he left disappointed.

One day as he came down he saw a man there waiting….

“Lord Piotr,” he asked, “why do you come here every day? Searching searching “

Piotr, taken aback by this mere mortal addressing him suchly, responded back,

“Where is the blind woman who sat here to meditate everyday? “

“Ah,” replied the man “she is gone… “

“Gone? What do you mean gone?”

“She was taken by her affliction and now she is passed. “

Piotr, fell to the ground in despair. How how could the reaper have taken such a beautiful and innocent thing? When there are so many more less worthy?

As Piotr’s tears ran into the ground, so full so love, so full of despair… a small delicate flower suddenly appeared from the earth.

Piotr touched the flower and felt that familiar fire, the flame of spirit… his heart lightened and his tears stemmed…he picked up the flower and put the glowing white bud in his hand…

and understood….

Those we love they never leave us- even when they are gone…The flame of spirit lingers on within all we touch, all we think, all we do….

Piotr carries his flower now like a flame with him- forever tucked away in the palm of his hand- forever glowing…..

dancing through all eternity; lord Piotr and his blind lover….

Weight

I feel the weight of your body
Upon me
And your breathe
In my minds eye

…You merge into my soul
An explosion of light and color…

I’m lost to the sea
To the caress of the wind
I surrender to time
Going under- giving in

the heart

~the heart~

my heart is alive with wonder
and pulsating with the glow of life;
my heart is a flower i place in your hand
to warm your soul

my heart is an open freeway
lighting energy along all ways;
my light will always find you
to move your spirit

…you are never alone…

my heart is guiding me closer
to the person i have always known
and within that process I found you
two old souls

fire of past

~fire of past~

I have a longing to pull flesh from spirit
and fill it with echoes of the past
my heart swells with remembering
and aches with separation

there is nothing that can remove
the thoughts of days beyond me
and the time that lies in front
is swellling with emotion

why does this vex my soul?
why, what can it mean to be pulled
so inexorably back to a place
that is no longer?

my mind is swimming with memories
that are not mine
and yet, dwell within me
a fire yet to be quelled…. a flame un flinching

i cry to be saved from this conflagration
of spirit… for relief from the fire of pain
and still i sit here, wondering
my soul, alight with mystery and divine

sorrow

My heart is breaking
He who knows me best, knows me not at all
And I feel so shamed for trying

The veil has been lifted from my eyes
Yet I feel more alone than I could have ever imagined
Ashamed and alone

Full of pain I sit here hoping
Someone can remind me
That the universe has a plan

That I am not crazy